I am a big fan of the Rectoverso anthology. My admiration also extends to the Rectoverso album.
This piece of writing is an attempt to delve deeper into the lyrics of ‘Grow A Day Older’, my top pick from the Rectoverso album. Penned originally by Dee Lestari, the song was a birthday tribute to her spouse.
Over repeated listens, I found the song resonating beyond a mere birthday celebration. The lyrics celebrate life and our surrounding world. It’s like a kaleidoscope of all the feels we experience, making it more than just a birthday tune. It’s a tribute to our existence and the abundance of experiences it brings.
See the sunrise,
Know it’s time for us to pack up all the past and find what truly lasts,
If everything has been written down, so why worry, we say
It’s you and me with a little left of sanity
On my childhood, I remember how I grew up and moved to another province. It introduced me to a variety of new experiences, friendships, also the local cultures in different regions.
As a result, I experienced separation from what was familiar multiple times. Moved away, left behind the familiar, and confronted the unknown. At the age of six, I didn’t fully grasp the concept of accepting fate or destiny. I didn’t even know which elements of life were within my control and which weren’t. But I can still recall the tears I shed during that time as I felt the separation. I could see that those people didn’t want me to go.
If life is ever changing, so why worry, we say
It’s still you and I with silly smile as we wave goodbye
And how will it be? Sometimes we just can’t see
A neighbor, a lover, a joker
Or a friend you can count on forever?
How tragic, how happy, how sorry?
For all we know, we’ve come this far not knowing why
The separations I faced sometimes brought relief. I no longer had to see the people who bullied me but also had a bitter side as I had to part with my best friends each time. I escaped the teachers who made my life difficult, but it also meant saying goodbye to the teachers who inspired and guided me.
Over the years, when I waved goodbye to my good friends, did they truly understand the significance of the separation?
As in the lyrics, “If life is ever changing, so why worry, we say. It’s still you and I with a silly smile as we wave goodbye.” Did they understand the mix of emotions — the relief, the loss, the anticipation of the new and the longing for the old — that came with each goodbye?
Sometimes, I find myself pondering. Where are they now? Are they married and do they have children? How are their parents doing? I wonder if their children resemble them, my long-time friends.
Now, as a 28-year-old adult, I find it hard to anticipate separations.
Sometimes, you quit your job or move across provinces. You secure a scholarship and relocate to another country, knowing that your scholarship strictly determines your academic achievement. You might get married and follow your spouse to a workplace far from your current location.
We never know what’s around the corner or how our decisions will shape our path.
Also, as someone who spends a lot of time for being intrusive, sometimes I find myself questioning, “Have I been kind enough throughout our relationship?”
So, would it be nice to sit back in silence?
Despite all the wisdom and the fantasies
Having you close to my heart as I say a little grace
In the hustle and bustle of adult life. In the midst of all the chaos. We always need those quiet moments. To appreciate the love we share with the important people in our lives. No matter how busy we are, we need to hold them close and show our gratitude for their part in our journey. Not to diminish our self-love, it matters too. Take a step back. Recognize our own growth. Be grateful for it. Seek a richness of life, instead of constant happiness.
I’m thankful for this moment cause I know that you grow a day older
And see how this sentimental fool can be
When she tires to write a birthday song
When she thinks so hard to make your day
When she’s getting lost in all her thoughts
…
When he ache his arms to hold me tight
When he picks up lines to make me laugh
When he’s getting lost in all his calls
When we can’t wait to say: “I love you’.’
That’s why.
Because we never know how our lives will turn out. We never know who will accompany us as we age.
I believe every person is born with a sense of kindness. Maintaining this kindness over time is not easy. But who knows, in our attempt to be kind — to ourselves first, then to others — we might discover new energy? A kind of energy that allows us to love others without diminishing ourselves? A kind of energy that lets us believe we are always alongside people, with each act of kindness leading us to an unknown journey — whether delightful or not.
Who knows?
Home, 16 April 2024.
